


The Best Laid Schemes Are Susceptible to Twin-terference

by DaintyDuck_99



Series: Mabel's Theory of Relative Crushes [2]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Dipper Squinting is like his own version of Mabel's Skepticals, F/M, Gen, Harry Potter references because why not, Mostly Plot via Plan Hashed by Mabel and Stan Disliking Country Music
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-22
Updated: 2015-02-22
Packaged: 2018-03-14 12:18:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3410351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaintyDuck_99/pseuds/DaintyDuck_99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stan gets roped into chauffeuring a sporadic rodeo and The Fellowship of the Ring to lord knows where, because Mabel has a plan, and she's hard to refuse. Especially since she knitted him a new pair of golden hued bunny slippers. However, he has a hunch that Dipper has his own ideas, and Stan isn't going to prevent the two of them from...whatever it is they are doing. Growing. Something that puts hair on the chest. They need that coming of age stuff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Best Laid Schemes Are Susceptible to Twin-terference

"I'VE GOT TWO BOYS IN THE COUNTY FOUR-H, I'M A LONG TIME SPONSOR OF THE FFA, HEEEY!" Mabel jettisoned her inner country sparkle through her powerful pipes, much to the blatant chagrin of one Stanford Pines, who clutched the wheel with enough force to choke a Manutaur and vowed that Mabel was no longer allowed to touch the radio, whether it be with her hands or a bedazzler or knitting needles or the blood of a virgin. No radio for Mabel. That put her on the List of Perps Without Radio Privileges, above Soos but below Dipper, who discreetly sniffed out disco ballads and made logical comments like "It's one of the only stations available." Which might explain the country, actually. Mabel was pretty good at rolling with the punches. Dipper was immersed in a copy of The Lord of the Rings, despite his sister channeling the reddest neck of Nashville from the front seat and the turbulence generated by potholes (and unfortunate wildlife, and a gnome or seven). Evidently the boy was also impervious to the nature of his sister's plan-- it was obvious that Mabel was attempting to set him up, and Stan figured that was the sort of thing he would refuse out of pride and priority, but the boy was bright. He probably had a plan of his own. 

Meanwhile, Dipper was glued to page number 394 in his gargantuan novel. True, it was fascinating, but he couldn't stop thinking about the idea Mabel had presented him with yesterday. "Bro-bro, I definitely know that one of my upsides is converting the non-believer." She had begun. He didn't interrupt, because Mabel's ideas tended to make sense somewhere in the middle if they started to make sense at all. She steepled her fingers together, copying him. "Earlier you barfed stone-cold logic all over my heart starting swoon supported Theory, and I gave you an out. But! You proceeded to be a wimp, and sit here with a Mr. J.R.R. Tolkien and his crazy magical Hogfarts whims instead of courting your new lady. Because you won't invite her over, I'm bringing you to her. In a manner of speaking." Dipper squinted at the way she put air-quotes around "manner of speaking", which probably meant that she had a middle-man involved. 

Mabel turned her grin up to 9067 Megawatts and unfastened her fingers from one another to give him a huge hug, burying the smile in his curly hair. It was hard to refuse a sister who tucked encouraging smiles into your hair and behind your ears. "I'm not disagreeing yet, but why?" He inquired. "Why do you want us in proximity so badly? Isn't this a little out of character for you? Shouldn't you be in Pacifica's face, making her scurry to prove her worth?" Mabel tisked against his skull and retreated to her original position, lounged on the opposite side of the yellow armchair. "I told you Dipper! You were defying the theory completely at first, but then you actually racketed up variables by spending time with Pacifica and learning about her, which makes her a contender. So I'm gonna show you that this could work! You'll be so happy! Like some kind of Uber Smart Clumsy Non-crafty Boy Mabel!" 

Dipper knew his sister was impulsive, and he had admittedly confessed to her that Pacifica was actually likable. However, the heiress was also vulnerable, at the precipice of finding herself. She probably wasn't looking for a relationship if her priorities were anything his, but she probably needed a friend. She wasn't the godsend, erudite adventurer he was looking for in a friend, but damn if he was going to be picky about a decent human being. He agreed to his sister's terms.


End file.
